Restless

We've been busy. Very busy. Maia just finished up five weeks of swim lessons--which is wonderful but scheduled activities always take more time than I suppose. I love to watch her in the water. She has so much confidence, and if she would gain just a bit more she would be swimming laps in no time. We spent most of this week at the pool. I love it. I wish I had my own, I think I'd never leave the house. So maybe it's a good thing we don't. ;)

But in between the fun we've been having is a nagging sense of restlessness on my part. I'm not comfortable in my own skin right now. I'm feeling disconnected and out of sorts. I want some time alone, or maybe I just want some child-free time. John has been working up a storm and I am feeling the weight of parental responsibility. Yea, I know. I signed up for it, but everybody needs a lunch break every now and then.

I have this crazy fantasy of showing up at John's office and sweeping him away for an evening of delicious food and good conversation. It involves a new dress and a babysitter and the look of surprise on John's face. But I'm afraid that's to remain a fantasy. The logistics are too overwhelming in this case to actually make something like that happen.

Second plan? None.

We need to get ready for our trip...which is currently in a state of flux. So I don't want to make too many plans until I know if John is coming with us or heading on his own adventure. I'm kind nervous about taking all the kids on my own. I'm trying to think about how I will unload the car, and haul all of them through rest stops, restaurants and hotels. Where will we all sleep? And three meals on the road? One will be in the car, but still. I have to figure how I can keep the stroller assembled and still fit in the babies pack-n-plays and a large suitcase for all of our goods. So far the best plan I've come up with involves packing an overnight bag separately so I don't have to unload the entire back of the car for one overnight stay.

That's something at least.

Maia is now up and I must begin my day in earnest. Good morning.